some people misinterpret marriages in some way...
in my assumptions, mostly thought its all about,
- love
- possessions
- money
- heritage
- babies (well, of coz its about babies...)
but they also forgot that it is also about,
- religion
- commitment
- passion
- struggle
- togetherness
- babies......
for some, i dare to say that, Hollywood really influence our lifestyle and beliefs... traditionally and spiritually... but of course, feelings are too, important in a relationship... to build trust and love towards our future spouse, but really folks? must we bury the need of 'movie romance' in reality?
think about it! mostly ladies..., those unreal chick flicks and soap opera you guys are watching. you really think people are like that? have you forgotten that its only entertainment? that is why, you are entertained, am i rite? im not against people who has dreams of endless romance and true love, but to be very very keen on getting exactly like one, you are definitely scaring people away...
for example,
screaming and ranting how good guys didnt want you, whereas there's alot of nice guys you'v friendzone. arent you being too picky?
and
crying and gossiping about how your boyfriend is sooo insensitive when he bought you a burger when ur on a diet, when u didnt even gave him the clue of you dieting? (guilty as charged)
you see, from this stage, people are already being judgmental, wanting a perfect relationship and ranting here and there.... its not wrong to choose the perfect spouse, coz u'r the one who will be living with the same person for the rest of your life.. but with this 'drama' attitude, im not surprise with the DIVORCE DRAMA literally evrywhere.... and also why people eventually turn homo....
talking about choosing a spouse, sometimes, parents are at fault too.. me, as a Muslim woman, we believe that marriage is Allah's blessing upon us. He gave us a path where 2 people meet and trust each other. and when marriage is brought up upon discussion, what men (and sometimes women) fears most is the Dowry. parents sometimes put the dowry price too expensive, making the men, either too scared or work hard but takes too much time... it may also a sign of parents disagreement of the match, but, wud it be nice if they were to be more rational? this kind of... threat.... is being a trend to parents nowadays and it is also, to show off how VALUABLE their daughter is... educated and polished and all... like diamond, or so~~ what they really didnt see, how the daughter vie for love and affection of being committed in a marriage... that is how 'forbidden acts' happens (one of the reason, anyways)...
also, marriage is actually about 2 people bonded with each other for all their lifetime... not how grand the wedding is or how tall the wedding cake is... not about racing to be 'Wedding of the Year'.... it is as simple as uniting 2 people together in a proper and halal manner... so personally, wedding events are just a way of telling friends, family and neighbors that you are married and happy.. that is all... its like celebrating 2 people's birthday at the same day... i said 'LIKE'! it is also fine to only fulfill the wajib stuff of marriage.. not hving a wedding ceremony, nobody's judging, but if they do, let them... it is only important when he said, "aku terima nikahnya......" and you being forever happy and content...
"aku terima nikahnya...."
that will be THE most romantic thing a man can say.
i understand that getting hitched only happens once in a lifetime, but which matters most? having a grand ball worth thousands of Ringgits? or the thought of successfully achieving being with the one you care for, for the rest of your life? there will always be anniversaries, and birthdays, and can also hv a pretend wedding again, partying with friends and family (creative, no?)... you will have hunnymoons and babyshowers and babies... and alot more to celebrate in life... dont hv to be too eager or competitive of having a GRAND wedding.. be humble and moderate.... and those xtra cash? keep it and buy future house appliances... well, unless you hv REALLY REALLY nice parents and friends, giving you xtra sponsors for a GRAND wedding... congratulation, you must be a really nice person... :)
so, in this extremely long post (considered long lah)... i pinpointed 3 things about marriage, Reality, Dowry and Weddings... which is, i think, THE most important issue in this matter. whatever i ranted about, i may be wrong, i maybe right... im not saying im totally right... evrybody has their perspective in life... this is only apart of it.... it is really up to you to think about it or not... hye, its a free world in that head of yours.... :)
p.s: ranting until 9.45am??? get real lah Puteri?????
